Thursday, November 27, 2008

i don't know what to call this entry, so here it is

I think part of being a Christian means surrendering your will.

Last Friday night Michael and I went to see the Batman movie – The Dark Knight. (It was playing at a second run theatre.) I was so impressed with Heath Ledgers ability to act. I think he should get the Oscar. But anyway his character the Joker was a fantastic portrayal of a villain. The Joker is chaotic, without a plan, out to just cause chaos (kind of like most middle school students- just kidding). I’m about to give away the movie, so please stop reading if you don’t want to know… One of the main things the Joker tries to do is to expose people. There is a new District Attorney who is loved by all and is a great public servant proving that he can bring down all of the city scum. The Joker then kills his girlfriend which turns the district attorney into a monster trying to track down anyone who assisted in her killing. The Joker seems to be able to expose anyone, showing that the best people can be still be scum.  

God’s light has always been something that scares me a little bit. God’s light will eventually expose us all which I don’t particularly like because it means that it will expose me to. I guess this movie showed me the difference between the Joker (Satan is referred to the angel of light in the Bible) and God. They both expose people but God does it for good and Satan does it for evil which takes me back to the surrender your will thing. Our will is going to be exposed one day and whether our will is saving sex traffic victims, building our own business, being a CEO of a Fortune 500 country, raising a lot of money or whatever it is (and however good it may sound), it is still our will.

Bono the lead singer in U2 tried to leave the band several years ago. He wanted to follow what he felt was his calling to do- become a pastor. His will became stronger and stronger and he just wanted to leave the band so he could become a pastor. Then one of his mentors said ‘Stop asking God to bless what you’re doing and start doing what God has already blessed.’ I think Bono is one of the most incredible Christians I have ever seen and he is still in the band. His work with red campaign and African orphans is incredible. His will, even though it sounded like a good will, was exposed and when he surrendered it, it was as if he was born again.

I used to figure out a plan and try to executive it, often by suggestive force in my voice. It never worked, not even when my plan was to share Jesus with students or provide service projects for others. Not that these things are bad, there just things like everything else- they must not be forced. A few years ago I surrendered my will in my occupation and I am so much happier today. God has given me a wonderful job, a loving husband, and good friends. I still have to surrender my will – it’s kind of a daily thing, but I no longer feel the pressure to get my will done. I have freedom to surf life and just live. It feels really good and shows me continually how good God is. 

No comments: